So you did see the size of the sausage my efforts resulted in yesterday? Well today I was even more pissed off, and too embarassed to show my equivalent of the thick cripsy slices of salty goodness that Ransay promised. I followed his recipe and the results looked nowt like it. I will have another go when time permits. It really is soul destroying to get to this stage only to unwrap an anaemic, flaccid and frankly weak skinny sausage-shaped morsel from the fridge, one that doesn't slice properly. It would rather fall apart under knife pressure and make a mess of my cutting board. Not to mention a mess of my hob. The vaguely shaped slices that did make it in to the pan spat and hissed like angry cats, and covered my naked chest and cooker with sizzling fat globules. I didn't even think the fat was hot enough! There must have been too much moisture in the sausage, I deduce. I need more advice. Detailed advice.
They say that practice makes perfect. Well, I certainly hope so. I need lots of it.